Child Shows Frustration or Big Emotions

Purpose:
To ensure children who experience frustration or big emotions are supported calmly and consistently, while maintaining classroom safety, dignity, and transparent communication with families.

SITUATION

A child displays strong emotions such as:

• Crying or yelling

• Frustration or refusal

• Shutting down or withdrawing

• Difficulty with transitions

• Overwhelm during activities

These behaviors are developmentally appropriate and require emotional support—not punishment.

CORE PRINCIPLES

• Emotions are valid; behavior is guided

• Regulation comes before reasoning

• Calm adults help calm children

• Dignity and safety are always protected

• Parents should not be surprised

STEP-BY-STEP PROCEDURE

STEP 1: Immediate Emotional Support

Teacher Responsibilities

• Stay calm and grounded

• Lower voice and body posture

• Ensure the child and peers are safe

Approved Language to Child:
“I see you’re having big feelings.”
“I’m here to help your body calm down.”

STEP 2: Support Regulation

• Reduce stimulation if needed

• Offer calming strategies:

  • Deep breaths

  • Quiet space

  • Sensory support

  • Comfort item (if allowed)

• Do not force participation

Important:
Do not require verbal processing during escalation.

STEP 3: Guide Behavior After Regulation

Once the child is calm:

• Name the feeling briefly

• Offer simple choices

• Redirect to activity

Approved Language:
“It looked like you were frustrated. You can choose the blocks or the art table.”

STEP 4: Observation & Documentation

Document behaviors and supports, not labels or judgments.

Acceptable Documentation:
“Child became frustrated during clean-up. Provided calm support and quiet space. Child rejoined activity after calming.”

Unacceptable Documentation:
“Child had a tantrum.”
“Child was difficult.”

STEP 5: Parent Communication

Who Communicates: Teacher or Director

Approved App / Verbal Message:
“[Child’s name] experienced some big feelings today. We supported them with calming strategies and they were able to rejoin activities.”

Keep communication:

• Neutral

• Support-focused

• Reassuring

STEP 6: When to Escalate

Notify the Director if:

• Emotional episodes are frequent or intense

• Child cannot re-regulate

• Safety concerns arise

• Behavior impacts the classroom consistently

STEP 7: Director Responsibilities (If Escalated)

• Review patterns and triggers

• Support staff with strategies

• Communicate with family if needed

• Develop a support plan if appropriate

WHAT STAFF MUST NEVER DO

• Dismiss emotions (“You’re fine”)

• Shame or punish emotional expression

• Label behavior negatively

• Discuss incidents with other parents

• Escalate emotionally

DAILY PREVENTION EXPECTATIONS

• Predictable routines

• Clear transitions

• Emotional language modeling

• Proactive support during known triggers